Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Dear Nelly...


Dear Nelly,

Oh my dear love. Why am I so obsessed with you? Posting these pictures of yourself does not help:


My obsession to Nelly is pretty well known. I literally would probably pass out if I ever met this hunk of a man.

Our relationship has been going strong now for at least 12 years. And by relationship I mean "I stalk him."

Literally last night I sat in bed watching You Tube videos of him, listening to his music for a good hour.

Gosh, my poor poor husband. He is going to be beyond embarrassed by this post. Oh well, he is used to it.

I booked my 30th Birthday Party location today. Yes, I am pulling the pure Diva-it's my birthday-I'll cry if I want to-birthday bash. I was speaking to my mother on the phone earlier and told her my only request would be for her to get Nelly at my party.

I really do not think that is much to ask for Mother. And Father, you too. After all you live just down the road him. (Or maybe his mother. I heard he gave his house that was featured on MTV Cribs to his mother. Is it true? I don't know. But I like to talk like I really know.)  Go knock on that door and cordially invite him.

Dear Nelly,

I can wear cornrows and get manicured toes.

I can check my reflection in the mirror and tell my best friend "my butt is literally getting big."

I want you for your Pimp Juice.

I, however, probably will not rob the jewelry store and tell em' to make me a grill.


Dear Nelly,

I will be at the Tim McGraw concert on May 23rd. It's a Thursday night. At approximately 7 pm. You can surprise me by coming upon stage with him. I fully give you my permission.
Please make an appearance with your ol' friend, Timmy, so I can sit and drool over you and wish that it was my name tattooed across your abs.

Love,

Your Nelly-lunatic of a fan/Lover

**********************************************************************************

PS--This is purely for fun and stupidity. I am in no way, shape, or form really a "stalker" of Cornell Iral Haynes, Jr. :)



Brista Barrington
11 Comments

11 comments:

  1. Lol. I think Nelly fans all around the world know exactly what you mean. Did you know that there is a Nelly Pillow? Uh huh. His friend Lonnie has one that she was hugging up the other day ;-)
    I don't know what it is about Nelly. It's a combination of his warm personality, the fact that he's willing to have fun, does good music, looks good.

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  2. Nelly fans all around the world know exactly what you mean

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